Monday, April 20, 2009

Choose Your Own Adventure

Fine buncha readers you all are... calling me lazy like that. You should be ashamed!

Just for that you all have a chance to pick my next post...

Your choices are...

1. A story involving Danzig, Cops, and a notice of nuisance.

2. A story wherein yours truly's best friend from college looked at him and said, "I've decided you're about a bastard."

3. A story involving a roommate and a "shoplifting" experience.

Be warned... each tale will involve some level of revelation about me, so choose wisely.

Running tally:
1 - 3 votes
2 - 6 votes
3 - 5 votes
none of the above - 1 vote
all of the above - 1 vote (WTF?)


Today's mystery lyric: (Remember the rules folks, no online searching of the lyrics, if you don't know it, you don't have the answer!) Here's one for my older readers... ewink

Now Paul is a real estate novelist
Who never had time for a wife
And he's talking with Davy, who's still in the Navy
And probably will be for life

Answer to last lyric: Tuff Enuff by The Fabulous Thunderbirds. I'm ashamed of all of you...

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

A Blast from the Past...

I'm feeling lazy today (I blame Tiff for this), so in light of today's date and all... I present to you a repost...

Oh! I forgot... MW's back... don't forget to run over and say hey.

I ran across this today in Les Nouvelles Fausses...


Royal Dew.

Correspondent: John Deaux

NEB -- In a move that's sure to shake up both the soft and hard drink industry, U.S. soft drink megacorp Pepsico and Canadian liquor giant Seagrams today announced in a joint statement their plans to release a new combined version of two of their most famous beverages. Citing slumping sales figures, the two plan to combine Seagram's brand whiskey, Crown Royal, with the ever popular Pepsico product, Mountain Dew under the brand name Royal Dew for sale in both the American and Canadian marketplace.

Whether it will be sold in stores, or behind the liquor counter is as yet undetermined, but its mere existence raises serious issues for debate.

Pro Family Group spokesman, T. Totler, expressed outrage at the announcement. "This is outrageous. This is designed to target today's misguided youth and nothing more. We're thinking of calling for a boycott on both products." However, when pressed by this reporter, Ms. Totler did admit to having consumed both products separately.

A local steakhouse/bar owner, who wished to remain anonymous, told this reporter he was overjoyed, "Man, this is gonna save me megabucks. I'm thinking I might even be able to fire a bartender now. At the very least, my waitresses won't have to keep customers waiting as long while they're in the back getting loaded."

As for the rest of the industries, rumors have already circulated that other major soft drink makers, in an attempt to catch up, have already started negotiations with other major liquor distillers to try and compete.

Photo Courtesy of the Amazing Abbadon

BTW, if you think this is a real news story, you need to have your head examined.


Today's mystery lyric: (Remember the rules folks, no online searching of the lyrics, if you don't know it, you don't have the answer!) Here's an easy one folks...

I'd lay in a pile of burning money that I've earned
and not even worry about getting burned
I'd climb the Empire State Building, fight Muhammad Ali
Just to have you baby close to me

Answer to last lyric: In a Big Country by Big Country. Way to go Simp!