Thursday, January 10, 2008

Loserology

Here we are again. But I'm shamelessly stealing this from Sunny. So... here we go.

MOUTHOLOGY

Q. What is your salad dressing of choice?
A. Italian (oily, not creamy)

Q. What is your favorite fast food restaurant?
A. Don't eat much fast food, but I'm going to say Dairy Queen.

Q. What is your favorite sit down restaurant?
A. I dunno... I guess it all depends on what I'm eating. Mexican - Guadalajara, Thai - Prasai's, Diner - Connor's Cafe, you know...

Q. On average, what size tip do you leave at a restaurant?
A. Depends on the meal. Good food, decent service... that'll get you 10-15%. Good food, cute service... that'll get you closer to 20% lech

Q. What food could you eat every day for two weeks and not get sick of?
A. Two weeks? Roast beef with mashed spuds and gravy and corn on the cob.

Q. What are your pizza toppings of choice?
A. Beef, black olives, mushrooms, and onions. That makes for an excellent flavor combination.

Q. What do you like to put on your toast?
A. Butter, jelly or honey.

TECHNOLOGY

Q. What is your wallpaper on your computer?
A. A picture of Sunny's kids. innocent Nahhh... This is it.

Q. How many televisions are in your house?
A. One. How many does a single guy need?

BIOLOGY

Q. Are you right-handed or left-handed?
A. Right. I can't piss my pants with my left hand.

Q. Have you ever had anything removed from your body?
A. As in major surgery? No... just the occasional sliver.

Q. When was the last time you had a cavity?
A. It's been a while. I thought I just did, but it turned out to just be my tooth wearing out. Gimme a break... it's a baby tooth.

Q. What is the last heavy item you lifted?
A. How heavy? I lift many 90lb hay bales every day.

Q. Have you ever been knocked unconscious?
A. Not that I recall... but then again, if I were unconscious, I probably wouldn't realize it either.

BULLCRAPOLOGY

Q. If it were possible, would you want to know the day you were going to die?
A. Not really. Although I have been to the death clock before.

Q. If you could change your name, what would you change it to?
A. Gerad.

Q. What color do you think looks best on you?
A. Depends on how big the hafro is and the amount of facial hair... Black's not too bad, neither is dark blue. Shows off the blue eyes better...

Q. Have you ever swallowed a non-food item by mistake?
A. Well, they claim you eat spiders while you sleep at night, but I never have. Nope... nu-uh. As for the rest, not since I was old enough to know better.

Q. Have you ever saved someone’s life?
A. Yep. I even wrote about one of them here.

Q. Has someone ever saved yours?
A. My cousin keeps telling me that he saved my life by killing a shit eating dog, but I don't think that counts. I'm going to say yes. Not quite sure when, but it probably happened.

DAREOLOGY

Q. Would you kiss a member of the same sex for $100?
A. Do Dads count? If not... no.

Q. Would you allow one of your little fingers to be cut off for $200,000?
A. Tempting... no.

Q. Would you never blog again for $50,000?
A. Hell Yes. I barely blog now! Show me the money!

Q. Would you pose naked in a magazine for $250,000?
A. For a quarter million? I'm worth more than that.

Q. Would you drink an entire bottle of hot sauce for $1000?
A. Oh yeah. That's not hard.

Q. Would you, without fear of punishment, take a human life for $1,000,000?
A. Would I kill someone? Yep. Would I murder someone for money? Nope.

DUMBOLOGY

Q. What is in your left pocket?
A. Lint.

Q. Is Napoleon Dynamite actually a good movie?
A. Let's put it this way... I live in Idaho. I remember the 80's well. I've been to Preston. No... ND is not a good movie, it's more like my life put to film. Except I don't dance...

Q. Do you have hardwood or carpet in your house?
A. Carpet.

Q. Do you sit or stand in the shower?
A. Stand.

Q. Would you live with roommates?
A. Given the right circumstances.

Q. How many pairs of flip flops do you own?
A. None.

Q. Last time you had a run-in with the cops?
A. Last summer.

Q. Who is number 1 on your Top 8?
A. Number 3.

LASTOLOGY

Q: Last Friend you talked to?
A: Michael.

Q: Last person who called you?
A: Michael

Q: Last person you hugged?
A: Hugged? erm... my nieces.

Q: Last person to stick their foot in your face?
A: Well... last weekend there was that girl in the back seat and she accidentally... erm... I mean nobody.

FAVORITOLOGY

Q: Number?
A: none.

Q: Season?
A: Spring

CURRENTOLOGY

Q: Missing someone?
A: Was I trying to hit them?

Q: Mood?
A: Harried

Q: Listening to?
A: TV in the background

Q: Watching?
A: TV in the background, Modern Marvels.

Q: Worrying about?
A: Deadlines and things I've got to get done.

RANDOMOLOGY

Q: First place you went this morning?
A: Folks house.

Q: What can you not wait to do?
A: I can wait to do most everything.

Q: What's the last movie you saw in theater?
A: Bourne Ultimatum

Q: Do you smile often?
A: Used to.

Q: Are you a friendly person?
A: Of course. Why? Who've you been talking to?

26 Comments:

Blogger Sunshine said...

OK, so I relent and, if prepared most tenderly and perfectly medium rare by a trained chef, I would eat steak for two weeks nonstop.

1/10/2008 7:24 PM  
Blogger LL said...

Sunny my dear... you're forgiven. Now go change it on your blog! :P

Medium rare? I learn a lot about you Sunny, I really do.

Tell you what, if you ever make it out here, I'll cook you the best medium rare steak I can. Or at least I'll take you out to a steakhouse or something.

1/10/2008 7:59 PM  
Blogger John said...

waitaminute...you can sit in the shower? That's a choice? Are you supposed to bring a folding chair or something? I'm intrigued.

1/11/2008 10:28 AM  
Blogger LL said...

I wondered the same thing g_s.

The only shower chairs I've ever seen are in old folks homes so they don't fall whilst in the shower.

Other than that... *shrug*

1/11/2008 4:57 PM  
Blogger fermicat said...

No flip flops? Too scared to wear them around your cows? ;-)

1/12/2008 11:16 AM  
Blogger LL said...

I cannot stand sandals or flip flops. I really don't care much for going barefoot either.

One time I injured my toe so mom bought me a pair of birkenstocks. I couldn't keep them on my feet or stand to have them on. They're still up at her house.

1/12/2008 11:46 AM  
Blogger fermicat said...

I love going barefoot. I can't do it anymore since I work full time and am a tenderfoot as a result of all those hours wearing shoes. Sandals, including flip flops, are the next best thing.

1/12/2008 3:55 PM  
Blogger LL said...

I think that right there puts you into the weird thread.

1/12/2008 4:15 PM  
Blogger fermicat said...

I'm weird because I like going barefoot? Or was it the tenderfoot thing? It can't be sandals because damn near everyone wears those whenever they can (including the dead of winter). At least they do here in the sunny south!

1/12/2008 4:41 PM  
Blogger LL said...

All of the above. ;)

1/12/2008 7:22 PM  
Blogger Beth said...

You'd kill, but not for money?

Hmmm ...

1/14/2008 7:52 AM  
Blogger LL said...

Yep. You see Beth... there is a difference between killing and murder. If someone came after me with a knife, gun, or other object in an attempt to do bad things to me and mine, I'd kill them and never blink an eye. (I suppose PinTA can give you the Firefly quote from Our Mrs. Reynolds that corresponds to that one.) That person needs killin', and I'd be much obliged to help them out.

Murder on the other hand is a whole different animal. It requires premeditation and an intent to take another's life for something other than self-defense or in time of war.

1/14/2008 8:10 AM  
Blogger NYPinTA said...

I think she was worried that you'd kill for the fun of it. I've considered it. Thank goodness for all of my potential victims that I am so freaking lazy.

The quote: "Anyone ever tries to kill you, you try and kill them right back.!" Or something.

1/14/2008 1:09 PM  
Blogger LL said...

Hmmm... kill for fun you say? Well, now that you mention it...

1/14/2008 10:01 PM  
Blogger Natalie said...

Please describe what you mean by "beef" as a pizza topping. Ground beef? Philly cheese steak beef? Fajita beef? Typical guy, no description and hates sandals. Sheesh. ;)

1/15/2008 2:47 PM  
Blogger LL said...

Rump roast. In fact... the bigger the roast, the better the pizza! :P

It's usually hamburger, but there is that occasional use of strips of meat. Hamburger is a bit easier to eat though...

1/15/2008 5:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Meatball. :D

1/15/2008 10:23 PM  
Blogger ctheokas said...

"Q. Is Napoleon Dynamite actually a good movie?
A. Let's put it this way... I live in Idaho. I remember the 80's well. I've been to Preston. No... ND is not a good movie, it's more like my life put to film. Except I don't dance..."

I knew it!!!

1/16/2008 8:30 AM  
Blogger Kathleen said...

Very funny, as always. As I told Fermi, I'm stealing this.

1/16/2008 11:15 AM  
Blogger Kathleen said...

Thanks for the Firefly quote, now I want to watch them all over again.

1/16/2008 11:17 AM  
Blogger LL said...

You think Preston is bat country? Damn... I don't think you do know what you're talking about CThee.

Kath... you're going to watch Firefly again because of that quote? I'm sorry... sooooo sorry. ;P

1/16/2008 3:57 PM  
Blogger fermicat said...

kat - all the cool kids are doing it. Stealing this meme and re-watching Firefly.

1/16/2008 8:54 PM  
Blogger tiff said...

I learn so much....

"can't piss my pants with my left hand" = LOL

1/17/2008 9:25 AM  
Blogger LL said...

Only if by "cool" you mean the elderly, infirmed, shut in, and loserly crowd... :P

Yes Tiff... I'm all about the education... ;)

1/17/2008 5:50 PM  
Blogger Beth said...

Oh, okay, I was putting my own spin on it. NYPinTA was right. I thought you'd kill, hell yeah, but accept no payment. Cool. Now I know!

Great killing quotes. Firefly was full of great quotes.

1/21/2008 7:28 AM  
Blogger LL said...

Nope... my name's not Dexter...

1/21/2008 8:30 AM  

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